Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Regrets and Resolutions

REGRET is a dreaded word.  Gives the mouth a sour taste whenever it says the word.  The could have beens, should have beens and would have beens of our lives.  No one is immune to it.  Now and then, here and there, once, twice, thrice or more, something's got to give and we make wrong choices.  A by the moment choice, or a purposeful choice just to end up embittered by regrets.  It could be a word said, and it doesn't have to be a mouthful of words.  A misdeed, mistake, miscalculation or misjudged.  Intent or with no intentions as to where the consequences fall.

The "IF ONLY" of our realities.  A second too late, a minute too soon could have altered what would seem to be a cruel fate or an unalterable doom.

The choices we make, the choices we make... echoes like chanting, cacophonous and oh so inharmonious with the impending corollaries of our mistakes.

Should have waited
Speak out
Curb your tongue:  Silence!
Patience:  "think before your act"
Just DO IT!

Can I take it back?  What I said, what I did?  Can I take it back?  TOO LATE!

R E G R E T S.

Yesterday while we were on our way to my Auntie Peta's Dr. appointment, we received a tragic call from a dear  relative of ours that his wife Nola, another aunt of mine, is in the hospital.  She was getting out of her car in the parking lot when another driver rammed his car into her, breaking both her legs.  Instantly my heart went out to my dear sweet aunt.  Could she ever walk again?  I wondered.  Or will she be bound to a wheelchair for the rest of her life, like my mother was bedridden!  A crack of a second, it was almost tangible, the agony and grief she must have gone through at that precise moment, suspended in time.  The REALIZATION!  Suddenly All my trivial pursuits and problems seem fleeing and insignificant in comparison  to what Nola must be going through at this moment.

REGRET feeds on self-pity, cowardice and weakness.  In our darkest moments, if we're not careful we'll be overwhelm and boxed in by our grief.  It'll seem as if the devil's on our back and we can't just "shake it off" as the song says.    Some are willing to go on an everlasting waltz with the devil.  Not allowing bygones to be bygones and let things go.  Instead they tangle on allowing the long, poisonous claws of regret dig deeper into their hearts.  Like an infested wound that won't be given a chance to heal.  Regret will become our demon if we let it wear us down.  Accept things as they are and move forward, learning from the past and striving for a better future. 

"With a Brightness of Hope". 

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