Sunday, November 30, 2014

Eld. Mahonrai Teancum Toki

On November 11, my son Mahonrai Teancum Toki was set apart as a full time missionary for the Lord.  He is 18 years old and have the desire to put off his needs and his wants and dedicate his time 100% to the serving God and His son Jesus Christ.   He serves in the North Carolina, Charlotte Mission and in the Guilford Ward with his very first companion Eld. Hunter Rasmussen from our very own Utah. 

A lot of people may wonder why "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints" send out these young women and men for 2 years.  These missionaries carry a message of PEACE, HOPE and HAPPINESS.  Because Heavenly loves all His children, he wants them to know about His plan of Happiness.  That way, they can go back home to Him.  The Savior Jesus Christ himself did His Father's very own will.  Showing people the way to live.

I love and miss my Eld. Toki.  We've been through our ups and downs as mother and son but he remained faithful and true to his desires to serve a mission.  Our family has been tremendously blessed since the day he left.  Small miracles every single day and I know it's because of Eld. Toki.  Through him, great blessings come into our family.

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Network Marketing

I have a sister-in-law that has worked the for USPS (Us Postal Service) for 22 years now.  She sorts mail and for that 22 years, I think she makes a little over $20 per hour now.  She has also underwent all kinds of surgery on her elbows, wrists, shoulders, knees, feet etc.  Almost every joint of her body has been put through surgery as results of pushing, pulling and carrying heavy mail containers and repetitious chores as sorting all kinds of mails.  Moreover, continuous standing for 8 hours or more as the Post Office demands of her was taking a toll on her body, but it was all worth the sacrifice for her family and it worked for her.

Amy S. breaks all kinds of records at my work.  She can make up to $700 per day selling Credit Repair.  Once in a training meeting she declared:  "I'm here to make money, not to make friends."  I like that she's determine to isolate herself from other employees while she's making her money.  But I'm thinking, why not kill two birds with one stone?  Make friends and make money.  Where's the harm in that and all the more richer when it comes to relationship with other people.  

I grew up in a humble home on , what Americans would call , a third world country in the island of Tonga. Education saved my parents from the bonds of poverty.  They were educated overseas and they were both full time working parents when I was growing up.  My mother was the secretary for the High School and my father was a Mechanic.  It was very rare to find women working and having careers back in those days.  We never lacked for anything.  From food to cars, motorcyles, trucks, boats to plows, we had it all.  Even the biggest 2 story house in the village.  I knew what well off means but didn't know a thing about how to stay well off. 

Seeing how my mom was a hard working woman, I was determined that I will have a career when I grow up.  Up until I had my first child, I decided I can't bear to leave him and seek employment. I didn't trust anyone to babysit my son and there was no job that could pay me enough money to make time away from my son worth it.  So I became a stay home mom.  7 children later, and a gout afflicted husband, I was force back to the working world.  Only, I was blessed with a job that didn't take me out of the home.   I was still in the crossroads for my children as they come in and out of our home. 

10 years in the same job, I realize that if I want money, I have to have something to sell.  I was already selling different products for my JOB, but I was selling it for someone else.  They were pocketing all that money that I'm bringing into the company and paid me $11 per hour plus commission which made up a fraction of what they were making off of me.  I had to switch employment.  An affirmation dawned on me that:  You can not become wealthy working within a 9-5 jobJOBS are good for people that don't want anything more.  Like my sister-in-law, she loves the stability that the Post Office gives her.   She was satisfied with it.

For me, I yearn for something much much more.  Not that I am ungrateful for what I have now.  I have been abundantly blessed by the good Lord with my family.   However, there's this tiny small voice that keeps urging me,  "Sela, you can do so much more.  You can give so much more and you can help so many more."  At the state that I am in right now with my family, the only people that I can help are my children, that's it.  I don't have enough to go around to anyone else and I want to be able to help people.  I'm one of those that give even if it's the last dollar on my ashtray.  To people that holds signs up on the streets.  I don't judge them whether they are able to work or not.  If I have, I give.  That's just me.  So not having so much to give, bothers me.

Network Marketing was introduced to us by an old childhood friend from Tonga a few years ago.  I hopped on with my husband and that's when I realized that I can actually do something different from what I was doing and make a lot of money.  My eyes were opened to the possibilities but things went wrong and my husband's health declined and we couldn't stay on.  A few months ago, another friend of mine from the same village in Tonga, introduced me to Engage DNA. Little did she know, I have been praying for something to help me with my energy because, I was working 2 jobs, a sick husband to take care of and 2 grandchildren that needed a babysitter.  Plus, my own children that I couldn't keep up with.  I was desperate. 

Engage DNA, worked miracles when it comes to my energy.  I gave it to my husband and I was stunned by the change that it has brought into his health and his energy level.   I had to get in.  Last week, I was able to pay $114 to join MMR (Engage DNA).   Now I want to introduce it to the people I love mainly because I know how much it has helped me.  My husband on the other hand is healthy enough to get around.  Our good friend Ken introduced him to Life Leadership, now he's determined to make that work.  We are in two different Network Marketing programs.  There are hundreds out there but you have to find the one that works best for you.  You work your own hours and you build your business and at the same time, help build people around you.  It's a win win situation.  Unlike Amy who doesn't want to make friends.  I love people and I love having tons of friends.  They are all part of my extended family. 

A unique quote comes to mind when I think about people that does Network Marketing:

"Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They invent. They imagine. They heal. They explore. They create. They inspire. They push the human race forward. Maybe they have to be crazy. How else can you stare at an empty canvas and see a work of art? Or sit in silence and hear a song that’s never been written? Or gaze at a red planet and see a laboratory on wheels? We make tools for these kinds of people. While some see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do."


Wednesday, October 22, 2014

"Unrecognizable Renee Zellweger"!

How I felt when I first took a glance at her face was this:  "Throwing my hands up in the air shaking my head in disgust and disbelief".  That's how!  Why Why Why do these people butchered an already beautiful and God-given face to put on a stranger's face?   Were they so dissatisfied and unhappy with the way they look!  Obviously or otherwise they wouldn't do it. 

Noooooooo!!! was all I could think of as I was speechless by the alteration.

I must admit I was shocked at the drastic modification that has been done to her already beautiful face.  Like a piece of fabric sewn together overnight and sadly, doesn't come close to the original.  I could understand a nip and a tuck here and there to make a face youthful and vibrant.   What I don't understand is the complete wipe out of your original face to a brand new unrecognizable one.  She has cut, sawed or lasered a piece of herself away and it can not be restored again.  Her face was perfect to me.

These Hollywood people of fame and fortune seems to never be satisfied with their lives, their looks and their money.  They live their life like the actors that they play on the screen.  BIG and always wanting to be someone else.  So confident living someone elses skin that when it comes to their own, they seem to loose track of their individuality and uniqueness as human beings.  Their own reality repels them, and I think this is what drives them to undergo so much plastic surgery and so much more in their lifetime. 

It's almost impossible not to tell who underwent surgery because they all look the same.  The fuller lips with square mouths, perfect forehead and nose without an ounce of a wrinkle. etc etc etc.  They need to embrace their beautiful existence for they are beautiful people.  Growing old is beautiful and undeniable.  BE your own true self.  I can't believe I'm never going to see her again.  Well, maybe with her old movies but still....I love the old face.  Boooooo!

Monday, September 29, 2014

Where I've Been

Mahonrai had an outstanding football season.  Team went undefeated 14-0 (Bingham High School)  He got a big fat ring.  He also graduated this past June. He had his share of being hospitalized for his heart this past year, for irregular heartbeat but nothing major.  In and out of the hospital.


Sisilia got married on Aug. 6th in the Salt Lake City LDS Temple.  Her sweetheart is Semisi Pau'u.  Dancing with her father who had just recently got discharged from the hospital after months of hospitalization and rehab center for physical therapy. Emotions were high as he prayed to live to this day to 
witness  witness his oldest daughter get married in the temple.My family is growing.  We now have two grandchildren already.  Selamafi and Pitisi.  What joy these two gives me.  A hardworking daughter in law and a worthy son-in-law.  We are a rowdy bunch and at times seem outrageously dysfunctional and goofy but together we can hold our own. 

Big Mo got his calling to serve the Lord in the Charlotte, North Carolina Mission.  He leaves for the MTC on November 12th.  How excited I am for this son.  I know he's going to be a great missionary for he is a Spiritual giant.  Mahonrai Teancum Toki.  His grandma Peta turned 80 on Aug. 23.  and to add to everything else, my beloved Uncle George passed away right after my daughter's wedding in July.

Alas, my three youngest beauties!  Bev, Mele and Patiola.  8th grader, 10th grader and a Senior in High School.  They are all my PEARLS. 

Sunday, July 6, 2014

Where's the Balance?

Juggling Motherhood and two jobs can be a little straining.  Long hours and lack of sleep, I'm discovering that while I try to make ends meet financially, it does not release or excuse me from the greatest role of my life as a woman.  That is being a mother to my children and wife to my husband.  I'm finding that BALANCE, is the epic challenge.  Therefore, to sustain peace of mind and meaning to my existence, I need that balance.

My children and husband do all that they can to assist.  (Even with his failing health, he tries) Laundry, dishes, cooking but I've become so critical with a keen eye to perfection that I oversee their sincere efforts and become somehow annoyed with the imperfections of their work.  Instead of being grateful, I'm mumbling disapprovement at how things should've been done.  This and that, Yadda Yadda.

When frustration, dissatisfaction and ingratitude sets in,  a lethal toxic mood within the mind and the heart is airborne.  My home thus, becomes a battlefield of spiteful words, unconstructive criticism and energy wasting anger.  This is where self hatred and self condemn rears their ugly heads.  Then eventually, everything turns infra-structure and I turn against myself to name and count all my weaknesses, incompetence and all that I am not.  

Prayers become my only refuge.  Only, it's hard to get on bended knees when I've hardened my heart with self loathing and complains.  And yet, I know that during dark times like these, only God Himself can fix me, but I feel so unworthy of His blessings and His Love.  To find my balance, I have to  eventually lay it all down at His feet.  My ungrateful heart, through uttered pleas for forgiveness and help, is swiftly heal by His Loving grace.  In His embrace he calms my turmoil thoughts and  reassures me that being "me" is enough and all that I have, I should be grateful for.  Count my many blessings and always, always be grateful.

Gratitude is the key for my balance.  

Therefore, the BALANCE that I seek truly can be accomplished.  Not with demands for perfections, but by being GRATEFUL for everything that I have.  My family, my life and the opportunity to still live and breath.  For work to provide and a chance to still make choices.  True balance and peace comes to me by way of Gratitude.  

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Life's Marathon

Since the last time I blogged, we've moved 2 times, worked 2 jobs and numerous, numerous hospital stays with hubby and my momma Peta.  To top it off, no computer at home and the non-stop challenges of every day living seems never ending.  One after the other of bombardment that got my head spinning but never for a moment discouraged.  Always better days ahead and like my new discovered passion comes by way of a man known as John Kehoe.  I've discovered creative ways to improve my mental health as that is what I fear, will be the first to go if I surrender to the pressures that I go through right now.  I believe God led me to John Kehoe to strengthen my brain and my courage. 

I am forever grateful for this life.  So beautiful and abundant.  God hath provided everything at our fingertips so we can be whatever we want to be and live as we please.  Everything is within our powers.

My Mahonrai graduated, thank God, from high school.  It was a long and hard road but it ended well.  Now he's getting ready to leave on his mission.  He has a girlfriend name Ali and she's as sweet as she looks.  So graceful and full of love for Mahonrai and for all of us. Hopefully, she'll wait for him until after his mission.  We all love Ali.

My Patiola has gone and got herself a job.  She pushes people around the airport and gets paid $5 per hour with tips of course.  I thought that minimum wage was $7 but this beats them all. 

Mele and Bev, to my surprise, signed up for the track and field in school.  Their cousin Nana got them into that and they did so good with their competitions.  Now, Mele is involved with volleyball and Bev is trying to get back with her old team.

My grand-daughter.  How can I not boast about this sweet addition to my family.  Her name is Selamafi after me and she is so beautiful and delightful.  We adore her and wait on her every time she's over.  We love her so very much.  Our family is growing.  The Marathon of life keeps getting better and better.  We trust in the Lord in everything that we do.  He is the master of our destiny.  We try to make the right choices.  Sometimes we make wrong and poor choices, but that's how we learn.

Things are looking up.  So funny how we always say the catchy phrase of a modern song that goes, "Started from the bottom now we're here."  Well we say it,  "Started from the bottom now we're still here".  LOL  Yes we may be still here, "at the bottom"  but we are so grateful for what we've been blessed with.  The gospel, roof over our heads, food on our tables and vehicles to transport us.  So much to be grateful for.

Saturday, March 1, 2014

March 1st 2014.  Inhale...Exhale 2 months has already gone by in this not so brand new year 2014.  This month I will be turning 50.  Body is starting to get old but my mind is as wise as ever.  Truly time has flown by so quickly.  This year has been such a great challenge.  Coming from under my own roof.  Life with it's funny twists and turns, always unpredictable and forever trying.  The waves of trials comes in gigantic tidal waves yet who am I to give up and give in.  New days, new challenges and it can wear me down at times and then with God's mercy, I always get back up and keep moving, keep breathing  and keep smiling.

When I was a young mother, everything I did was for the benefit of my own children.  There were things where at the time, I thought I was doing right.  Just to discover that may be I should have give it a second thought.  But to change my past, would mean to change who I am to-day and who I am to-day, is a woman refined by her trials and strengthened by tribulations.  I love who I am to-day.  A woman, a mother full of love and compassion for her children and for others.  A woman of faith and a God loving woman.

This is why I miss blogging.  The chance to unload all my burdens and my delights on a brand new page meant only for me.  We are on the verge of another move.  In search of another home.  Our homes may change and perhaps more times then others, but I look at it as a new start and a new chapter in our lives. "Life gives us lemon and we made lemonade out of it".  There's no time for whining, no time for judging and certainly no time for anger.  Time is as precious as diamonds and gold.  That is all we have with our loved ones and ourselves.

Make it count.

Make it count.

Who knows what tomorrow may bring?  Only God knows.  For us mere mortals, this is just a temporary stop to where we're really destined to go.  I love, love, love my children and my family.   I love people, good or bad.  I love everyone.
I love you if you're reading this.

Thursday, January 9, 2014


I wonder what's to become of this generation where Technology has found a niche in the palms of their hands.  Instagram, Facebook, Vine, Youtube, iCloud etc has taken over the world.  Our children bends to direct their attention to the Social Medias of this modern days.  Scary, annoying, disturbing and very distracting.  I don't own a cell phone and I don't buy my kids any.  My thoughts on the matter is that, when they grow up and find a job, they can afford to buy themselves their own phones.  It's just one more expense that I can do without.

However in some mysterious ways, they come across an old cell phone of my husbands or one of my older children, charge it and wa la they can access their Social Medias as long as we haveWi Fi in the home.  They become deaf to calls, blind to instructions and oblivion to chores.  That's when I start exercising my lungs in yelling.  

My son and my daughter drives one hand on the wheel and one hand on their phones.   Shuffling through which song they want to listen to while they drive.  They have no clue that it only takes a few seconds to get into an accident.  I look around and see other drivers are doing the same thing.  It is pretty scary.

Our conversations are constantly interrupted by so many things now:   The ring of a call, whistle of a comment, different sounds to responds made on Facebook or a text message.  Rarely do we carry out a decent conversation uninterrupted by our iPhones or Cellphones.  Rudely we pretend like we're listening but our attention is drawn to whatever it is that came through on our phones.  So truly, this is a distracted generation.

Technology provides instant gratification and information.  It can be a positive thing and at the same time bares the opposite effect.   Everything in an instant of a second.  Sometimes I like it but when it takes over our time to distract us,than that is another matter.   When we sit around the living rooms of our home, it's chaotic because some is on their FB on their phones, one is playing game, the other is watching TV and there's no one to talk to.  There's technology for ya.  I end up watching TV even though I'd rather converse face to face.  

At the rate we're going with our "can't do without" technology, I see a crash is unavoidably going to happen.  Just like computers crash when it overloads with information, something is bound to happen sooner or later.  

Sunday, January 5, 2014

New year, not so new start

Back at the hospital again with my husband.  An unexpected mild heart attack brings us back again to the dreaded place.  At first we didn't think anything of  it, I wanted to make sure he's okay.  Paramedics confirmed my fear so we ended up being rushed to the ER and then later on admitted to a room.  Come this Monday, he will be going through Catheterization of the heart.  Something short of heart surgery or what not.
The reason for his mild heart attack brings a bitter flutter to stomach and a dull pain to my chest.  The more I think about it the more I want to forget it ever happened.  I am full of concern though for my children but I have to trust and have faith in the Lord that everything will work out well for all of them.   I don't have time to ask the "whys" and the "why nots".  All I can do is get up and move forward.  Endure my trials and tribulations with grace and hope.  Somethings I am no stranger to.

Half of 2013 was spent in the hospital.  Now the beginning of 2014 we're back at it.  To-day I had to take my baby Beverly to ER 'cause I was afraid she might have contracted some kind of virus in her throat.  My husband was upstairs on the fourth floor.  We were downstairs at the ER.  Gave me time to pamper my Beverly.  Something I haven't done in a while for I was always working, rushing or in and out of the hospital.  I have missed babying my baby.  She wanted me to massage her head and her feet.  I realize how precious my time is with my children and how I've missed that one on one connections with each of them.  Oh how I love them all

I am concern however about my son Leveni and his wife Fusi.  They are going through some turmoil in their marriage and I'm helpless as how to help them.  My granddaughter Selamafi on the other hand, brings us all so much joy.  I adore that little girl.   Every one loves her.  So vibrant and joyful.  She makes me smile when her little face lights up with recognition of people that surrounds her.  What a beautiful addition to our family.

Gosh but I have missed blogging.  Spilling my heart out with every letter lightens the burden that's weighing it down.  I love blogging.  I love the fact that I can get on any computer anywhere in the world that has internet and will be able to access my blogs.  I'm thinking of starting a fourth blog but spreading myself too thin through my realities and my blogs is not so appealing to me at this time.  Plus, I'm waiting to get my tax return so I can get a computer for the family.  Right now we're all just using cell phones.  Not that I have one.  I'm beginning to think I do need one.  Seriously.

This 2014 is so brand new.  For some reason I feel so old in it.  All because of my attitude so I'm straightening out my stature and snapping my head up high.  If I'm to be strong, I need to walk the part and quit whining.  This too shall pass.  The sun is shining outside and I need some of that sunshine in my heart.  Cheer up and get back into life.  I love it.  Happy New Year one and all.